Monday, March 28, 2011

How I spent my weekend

I spent it with my FIL. That should just about sum it up.

We haven't seen him since we moved here in December. It's been ...nice. Of course, he was beginning to complain about not seeing Stowa which led to threats of him coming here. Itchy decided to take the proactive approach and told him we'd go there to visit him.

We got to his house and he told us that the downstairs bedroom was all ready for us. Translation: There are no sheets on the bed, no blankets, no pillows, no toilet paper in the bathroom, but it has been vacuumed.

Itchy's oldest brother and his kid were there for a little while acting as a buffer which was nice. After they left we took Stowa outside to play and run off some energy. FIL wanted to go shopping. He likes to buy stuff for Stowa. I have no problem with that. I'd much rather go with him and pick out stuff that I know she needs (and that I like) than have him buy her a bunch of junk. However, shopping with him leads to awkward situations.

Anyway, we go to the mall. He rides with us. In the backseat next to Stowa. She's sleeping. He gets in the car and says "I don't want to wake her". Great then don't. So what does he do? Pokes her in the face. What the hell? Why? She cries but goes back to sleep. She woke up again while we were looking for a parking space and he continued to poke her in the face and in the side. She does not like this.

We went to the store I wanted to go to (they had a sale going on and I like their clothes). FIL behaved. He picked out a few things for Stowa. Itchy and I picked out a few things. Stowa even picked out a few things (mostly because she could reach them). After leaving there, FIL wants to go get ice cream. Not because he really likes it but he thinks that we're going to let him give Stowa ice cream. She doesn't really get stuff like that. Food and FIL is an epic battle to say the least. But we go find a place to get him some ice cream. Stowa and I go into the store next to the ice cream place so she could walk around. Itchy comes to find us a few minutes later. FIL had to go sit down. He apparently slipped on some ice when we were walking into the mall. His knee is really bothering him. He went to find a table.

We go out to the food court to find him and he is sitting at a table with some random woman. She has a tray full of food and it appears as though she is waiting for others to join her. There is only 1 other chair at this table. There are empty tables 10 feet away. FIL is sitting there completely ignoring the fact that the woman is there. It was strange. We ask him to move to a different table where we can all sit down.

After that little break, we went to look at shoes for Stowa. This reminds FIL that he likes to harass shoe store employees. He went into three different shoe stores and asked for very specific socks that are "$30 a pair because he can't wear cheap socks". He also can't pronounce the name of these socks very well so most employees have no idea what he is saying. When they tell him they don't have them, he gets mad. Then he has to go look at shoes. But all the shoes are "junk". And they never have his size. He gets upset with the employee and storms off. Itchy and I wait outside the store. Never go into a shoe store with FIL. Same crap every single time.

After we got Stowa a pair of shoes FIL decided that it was time to eat dinner. It was a little early, but whatever. We go to get dinner. He informs us that IHOP is his favorite restaurant. Take that IHOP. You get to have FIL frequent your restaurants. Good luck with that! We didn't go there though. Anyway, FIL asked the waiter about low cal meals. Wanted to know which meal would be healthier. The waiter explains it pretty clearly. FIL then proceeds to order the food that the waiter just explained had way more calories. Waiter takes his order and gives me the "WTF look".

We dropped FIL off after that and went to hang out with some friends. That was fun.

On Sunday we went to hang out at Itchy's brothers house. Itchy's other brother didn't want to see their dad so he didn't come but his wife and son did. We were all having a pretty good time. The kids got to play together. The adults got to talk. FIL wasn't too annoying until he started giving me crap about how we dress Stowa. He does this all the time. He says that when she gets older she's not going to dress like me or Itchy. She's going to dress like him. In nice clothes. She isn't going to dress like a slob. She's only going to wear dresses. Especially once she starts school.

This shit drives me crazy. I dress my kid so that she is clean and comfortable. I think her clothes are cute. She dresses appropriately for the occasion. FIL needs to shut the fuck up about how I dress my kid. He needs to look in a damn mirror and see that wearing ugly ass sport's jackets and aviator sun glasses does not mean you are dressed nicely. It makes you look old. Also, the comb over hairdo he's rocking needs to go!

When he started giving me medical advice about my kid I just about lost it. Her rash is different from his rash. Last time I checked there was no magical cream that got rid of eczema. I'm sure that rash cream you have is wonderful, but I don't want it.

There were a few other gems but they are escaping me right now. I'll post if I remember them.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Finally

We FINALLY got a new computer. It's all shiny and pretty. It has all the keys. I'm still getting use to it.

I want my bookmarks on this computer though. I don't know how to do that. Itchy better know.

Friday, March 4, 2011

FYI

Just a little FYI for you guys. The green Crayola marker isn't as "washable" as the other colors.